They started out talking about The Hunger Games, which I’ve heard a great deal about but never read. (Neither had he, as it turned out, so he had no opinion on the casting of the film.) “I loved the first book,” she said, “but I wish someone would re-work it as an adult novel. There are things you don’t mind when you’re a kid, but as an adult, you learn to question them. Like, I kept thinking, ‘Where are all these cameras actually located?’ A kid wouldn’t think to ask that, but it was so distracting, I could hardly finish the book.”
That didn’t keep her from finishing the series, though. She hated the last book. “It just wrapped up so fast,” she said. “It was wholly unsatisfying. It was like the publisher said, ‘Oh, we told you have two more months, but we need it tomorrow.’”
“They probably did,” he said. “That was probably about the time the film option came in, and she had to finish it fast.”
They moved on to Sucker Punch (“I’m really glad I get to be the first to tell you this,” she said. “You were right. It was awful.”); how Zach Snyder landed another big-budget film (she’s neither read nor seen Watchmen, but he thinks Snyder ruined it, and has a theory that America’s submerged homesexual desires account for the success of 300); life drawing by way of Dr. Sketchy’s; and then back around to YA literature.
“The book I’m writing is YA,” he said.
“”Why,” she asked. “I mean, okay this is a little weird, so just stay with me. You’re like… an R-rated person. Anyone really interesting is. So why would you… I guess it seems like almost dumbing yourself down to try and write for kids.”
And as I’m siting there hoping he’ll tell her that YA literature is much more realistic, complex and interesting than she’s giving it credit for, he admits that his first draft contains far too many repetitions of the word “fuck,” and that he’s struggling to work in a sex scene.
“There’s a sex scene in Twilight,” she says.
“What? Where they skip over the whole thing and she wakes up bloody and bruised? I’m not going to do it like that. I think I’ll just sort of mention it happened, without really ever saying anything about it.”
“So why are you doing it as a kid’s book?” she asked again. “Is it just for the story, or…”
“Oh, no,” he said. “It’s for the money.”
I gathered up my phone, jacket and bag while he launched into an explanation of the YA market. Even had I been able to call one of the many excellent writers in my extended network who’s producing intelligent, challenging YA, I doubt either of them would have listened.
